From Caterpillar To Butterfly
by Tracey Gardner, Set Me Free Ministries Board of Directors
I am 38 years old, married with three children (ages 9, 5, and 3 months), and still waiting to become the woman God intended me to be. I remember when I had a long list of “things I’d like to change about me.” Some things I have managed to fix, some things that I have fixed have broken again, some things I still struggle with, and new things keep finding their way to my list. So the list never ends, which brings me to this blog.
Every time I feel like I am getting close to feeling pretty content with how I am doing on my list, Satan appears. He is not even sly about it! I make a commitment to work on “taming my tongue,” and sure enough, within no time at all, I sound like a truck drivin’ mama! I decide to be kinder to my husband and kids, and suddenly I feel like I have PMS on steroids! One step forward, two steps back is how I feel sometimes when it comes to my list of self-improvement. Those two steps back can make you feel like such a failure (thank you again, Satan). So I am wondering … will I ever become a true woman of God? I don’t know. I will keep praying for God to help me with my list, and He will continue to give me opportunities to work on it. What I do know is that each time I conquer one step on my mission to become the woman God created me to be, He puts another step in front of me to take me to the next level (and I almost always immediately trip on it). So I guess I just keep working on those things on my list and give myself some grace along the way. I like the way Queen Latifa said it on Ellen the other day: I am just a caterpillar waiting to turn into a butterfly!
“Now may the God of peace make you holy in every way, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless until our Lord Jesus Christ comes again. God will make this happen, for he who calls you is faithful.” 1 Thessalonians 5:23 – 24